The Avengers Headcanons

May 15

Submission #2471

As the Hellicarier is technically a ship that he is in command of, Nick Fury frequently officiates the weddings of his subordinates.

Submitted by dianariggslegs

May 14

Submission #2470

Darcy and Tony love Mean Girls, and decided to show the movie to everyone else.

Everyone loved it, perhaps a little too much. After the second week of excessive quoting, Fury banned anything to do with the movie.

Submitted by thesilverdoe394 

Submission #2469

Everybody at SHIELD tells Chuck Norris jokes, but they change them so they are about Phil Coulson. Phil Coulson tells Chuck Norris jokes, but he changes them so they are about Captain America.

Coulson’s favorite is “Captain America once took a piss in a truck’s gas tank as a joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.”

Submitted by madman-with-a-pen 

Submission #2468

The boxing gym where Steve works out is the gym where Battlin’ Jack Murdock used to train. 

Submitted by madman-with-a-pen 

Submission #2467

The Tesseract is a machine built with the element Tony uses to power his suits.

Submitted by anon

Submission #2466

Natasha is ambidextrous. She was born left handed, but the Red Room forced her to learn to use both hands equally. This is why she can use dual pistols efficiently in combat. Whenever she carries one gun, however, she always uses her left hand. Being a leftie is another thing she shares with Clint.

Submitted by madman-with-a-pen 

Submission #2465

When Tony and Pepper get married, Tony wears gray sneakers with his tux just because he knows it will drive her crazy. The photographer gets a picture just as she sees his shoes and rolls her eyes, and Tony asks for a wallet sized version.

Submitted by fangirlandproudofit 

Mother’s Day

Content warning: miscarriage

Ever since they started working together, Clint buys Natasha tulips on Mother’s Day. The tradition came about when Clint found out she once had been pregnant, but had miscarried in the later stages. Ever since, he’s called her an “honorary mother” and makes sure that she has someone to be with on Mother’s Day.

Submitted by think—itsnotillegalyet 

Submission #2464

Loki was the one who hid entry 2415…mainly because it included his secret plans for taking over Earth.

Submitted by rgpuck 

Submission #2463

Natasha loves shopping—the other Avengers? Not so much. She gets frustrated going alone, since not even Clint will go with.

She does manage to steal Tony’s credit card, though.

Submitted by M